“Rest and self-care are so important. When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.” —Eleanor Brownn

In our fast-paced, high-stress modern world, it’s more important than ever to prioritize self-love and self-care. These two interrelated concepts are the foundation for our mental, emotional, physical and spiritual wellbeing. They are also the foundation for healthy relationships!

Often self-care gets misunderstood as self-indulgence…letting yourself have and do whatever you want whenever you want it, whether it’s good for you or not. Self-indulgence often leads to self-sabotage… working against yourself and your own goals.

But self-care is much deeper than giving in to your whims of the moment…it’s about learning to give to your body, mind and spirit the same level of care you would to a child or loved one who is in your charge. And that sometimes means doing things you don’t really want to do…because you know it’s good for you and will benefit you in the long run.

So let’s explore what self-care is all about, and how to create a powerful self-care practice!

What self-care is and isn’t

Popular culture seems to suggest that self-care is about spa days and getting your nails done. And while these things can be a nice treat from time to time, there is a big difference between self-care and self-indulgence.

In much the same way that you don’t need to give your child a cookie or new toy every time they want one to show them you love them, you also don’t have to spend lots of money indulging your every desire to prove you love yourself. (In fact, if you’re spending all your money on artificial nails instead of healthy food, you’re likely neglecting your real needs.)

Self-care is much deeper than buying yourself flowers (but thanks for the reminder Miley Cyrus!). It’s about taking care of your mind, body and spirit in a way that demonstrates you understand what you really need to be happy and fulfilled.

Most people don’t need spa days (though we may want them). What we need is physical & mental wellbeing, connection to source and others, care and concern for our feelings, affirmation and validation of who we are and why we matter.

So self-care is about tuning into your body, identifying your deepest needs, and learning how to prioritize and fulfill these needs regularly so that you’re taking care of your mind, body and spirit daily.

Why self-care matters

The importance of self-care cannot be overstated. When we neglect our fundamental needs, we become depleted, stressed and susceptible to physical and mental health issues. And our distress (and resulting irritation and resentment) can negatively impact everyone around us.

But when we make self-care a priority, we become more resilient, confident, energetic and capable of showing up fully for our relationships and goals. We’re better able to manage life’s inevitable challenges. And we radiate positivity that can inspire and uplift those around us.

Let’s look at 3 ways to practice self-care…

1. Caring for your body

One aspect of self-care is caring for your body, treating it with the love and respect it deserves (the same love and respect you want others to treat you with).

This includes:

• Eating healthy food
• Drinking enough water daily
• Exercising / moving your body regularly
• Getting enough sleep
• Giving yourself time to rest and recharge

Caring for your body also includes learning how to self-soothe…to regulate your emotions and calm your nervous system when you’re feeling upset.

This may include:

• Breathing deeply
• Walking in nature or practicing yoga
• Meditating
• Comforting yourself with warm clothes, blankets, tea, soup
• Getting a massage or energy work to help release stress hormones
• Using a massage ball to give yourself a massage

2. Caring for your mind

The second element of self-care is caring for your mind. This includes becoming more aware of both the thoughts you think daily and the information you are consuming.

Some ways to better care for your mind include:

• Releasing negative thoughts and emotions through journaling
• Taking in positive podcasts, books, movies, TV shows
• Learning something new that interests you
• Tapping into your creative side
• Setting goals and practicing affirmations

3. Caring for your spirit

The third element of self-care is taking care of your spirit…the emotional and spiritual aspect of you that is more than just a human body.

Some ways to care for your spirit include:

• Connecting to source energy through prayer, meditation, spiritual community
• Getting out in nature
• Listening to uplifting music
• Writing what you’re grateful for in a gratitude journal
• Connecting with people you find uplifting
• Donating time or money to causes you believe in

The interesting thing about self-care is that the better you treat yourself, typically the better others start to treat you too. And even if they don’t, you’ll be well looked after because YOU are taking care of you and making your wellbeing a real priority in your own life.

This will allow you to make better relationship choices…surrounding yourself only with those who care for you the way you do.

Take good care of yourself…because you deserve it!

xo Karen

Resources

Other articles you may find helpful:

• The connection between loving ourselves and loving others
• No partner, no problem: A single woman’s guide to an unforgettable summer!

Share your ideas

What are your favourite self-care practices? Please share…